Saturday 9 July 2011

I think there's a fork up ahead...


And then she asked me, “Are you good enough to be pursuing this dream?” 
I honestly didn’t have an answer.  Everyday I continue down this dirt road towards.. what?  Something.  A glimmer of something that will complete me… a dream I’ve yet to have.  Every day I continue down this same path because I come across new people, new obstacles that I overcome and make me feel like I can take on the world.  I can do anything.  Even through all these mini goals I’ve achieved, however, it never silences the voice in my head that tells me I’m just an ignorant fool chasing after a world that will never accept me for who I am.  I’m not special.  I’m not good enough.  There’s nothing optimistic about this post… It’s not meant to be motivational.  Tonight I felt the other side of the starving artist life and I wasn’t prepared for it.  ”How long do you see yourself doing this for?”  I wanted to shout FOREVER… I wasn’t prepared.  I’m not good enough… I’ll never make it.  ”This begs the question… what do you want?”, he asked me.  
I honestly didn’t have an answer.

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